Home. Joke example sentences, listen the pronunciation, easily copy & paste. 4. Joke 17 Homeopathy holds that a substance, which causes symptoms when taken in large doses, can be used in far smaller doses to treat those same symptoms. The executioner drops the blade which stops an 16th of an inch from his neck. But it was hard to joke about the matter. I don't know a lot about grammar. A man is walking along a beach. The next sentence is telling the truth. S: ‟My grandma was arriving at the train station so i was centimeter”. Skip to main content Jokes for Us. T: ‟No, no, that‘s ‘Sent to meet her‘. Always put 'am' after "I." Walker, the Grumbleweed, likes to tell jokes about seagulls. And if they have any eggs, get a dozen!” So the programmer comes home with 12 gallons of milk. The previous sentence is telling a lie. ** **The certificate was for consultation with an Indian medicine man living on a nearby reservation who** **was rumored to have a simple cure for erectile dysfunction. The next year she goes in and says … Creates backwards sentences saying how crazy it is? As the hangman put the noose around his neck, he was asked, “Do you have any last words?”. Write joke. But She’s Not Here Now So I’m Going To Capitalize On This Opportunity. Amazing Jokes Bad jokes Capital Letters Capitalization Jokes Capitalize Me English Good Jokes About Grammar Grammar Great Jokes It's Actually Hard To Find Jokes About Something So Specific Joke Catalog Jokes About Capital Letters Jokez Joking Language Language Jokes Research Went Into This … The last joke got the biggest laugh. In the men's bathroom. Fox News: The Portland demonstrator captured on video beating another man during a protest was sentenced to 20 months in prison, authorities said Monday. It makes suggestions before you finish your sentence, Your just like coconut water, nobody likes you! The blade comes down and stops just before the priest’s neck. The class was then asked to punctuate the sentence. We've collected the best of sentence jokes and puns just for you. Naturally, the composer was extremely nervous, as the dictator had a habit of giving the death penalty to those who did not please him. English Joke - A Sentence That Starts with "I" Download MP3 (Right-click or option-click the link.) 3. He loved his job. [=do you think that what you are saying/doing is funny?] the punch line of a joke. So as the priest was being executed, the guillotine got stuck. Enjoy these hilarious and funny sentence jokes. Not Boring Jokes about English Grammar; Spanish Sentence Checker- a Tool to Help You Write Sentences Without Mistakes in Spanish; Sentence Structure Online- Check, Whether Your Sentence Structure Is Correct; Sentence Structure Check- What Are the Key Elements of a Correct Sentence … So, he’s on death row and the executioner approaches him. Never put "is" after "I." A joke never gains an enemy but often loses a friend. “The sky is definitely blue.” “Very good Kevin,but the sky can also be blue or black.” the teacher replied. These examples have been automatically selected and may contain sensitive content. Well, the whole sentence was "you're pretty annoying" but i only focus on the positive things, There to greet them is none other than Satan, who tells them a secret method to getting into Heaven: Each man must spend 1,000 years in a room with their greatest vice. Internet jokes are usually shorter (sometimes they don’t even use full sentences) and they can combine words with images and short videos. 3. It’s “A man *ran* by a campsite” because it’s past tents. use "joke" in a sentence We had to stop class and go outside when some idiot pulled the fire alarm for a joke last week. Obviously a Girl, because it won’t let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion. Sen­tence Jokes. Read more… He has joked about becoming their chief executive. Sussy says. **Teacher:** I don't know, can you borrow a pencil? Teacher: Stop! He planned brutal practical jokes, in which blows had always a share. JOKE #13. The executioner drops the blade, but, “Attention class I have two words: Cheetah, and dandelion. My mother's kind god was a myth and a joke, with no power here one way or the other. Times, Sunday Times (2016) The classes are fun and we flirted and joked about getting together. 6. 3. IRS. Share on Facebook Share on Twitter. Each of the three prisoners were brought up one at a time in front of the firing squad. 2. Pedro: Ma'am! 4- This does not mean you should tell jokes at random. Read our collection of funny, witty & humorous grammar jokes and see if you've ever cracked one? Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. I was sitting in a bathroom stall "doing my business", when suddenly the guy in the neighbour stall started: **"Hey man, how are you doing?"**. What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws? Learn the definition of joke and how to use it in a sentence. The blade again stops inches from the neck and the drunkard is f. Gore was a liberal who favoured legalization of prostitution. Search. So she asks him to please step up to the front of the class and recite his sentence. Worst Jokes Ever. Amid jokes about his skill with a knife, they shared bites and endured more pictures. He asked her to say a sentence. 7. But he doesn’t flinch, so then the king says, “you’re a brave man go out and be with your people.” It is the French man’s turn now. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. Some people enjoy cooking their families and their dogs. 3- He was telling her jokes , as usual. If you are a grammar nazi, then you will surely annoy with contractions … Jokes sentence examples. Worst Jokes Ever. S: ‟My grandma was arriving at the train station so i was centimeter”. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? It was offered as a joke, not a political statement, It's difficult to see joke in a sentence . He suffered some minor injuries but he decided to pretend to be in a coma for rest of his sentence. During their vocabulary session the teacher begins her lesson with the word Contagious. As they’re heading out, their spouse yells down the stairs, “Oh, hey, when you’re at the store could you grab a gallon of milk? The teacher asked her class to use definitely in a sentence. The drunkard is asked the same question and responds with face up hoping he’ll be saved like the priest. Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash. Best. Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him. After a couple years they have been telling the same ild jokes over and over but they ate still funny and every time they tell one they rol, The Italian is first and goes up to the executioner. They had nearly given up when one day they heard about this spiritual healer. 3. Somebody else was telling him not to joke about it. This is seen as a sign from God and the priest is set free. Eats, shoots, and leaves.”. You: When you’re obsessed with drugs you are…? “Yes, Cindy?” She answers, “I was at the dentist’s office with my mom, and she said not to play with the toys in the waiting room because the other kids were contagious.”. To the pharmacist's dismay, he immediately opened the bottl. But she yelled "Shut up, I'm on the phone!" 9. 1- Thomas is sure that he can make Hiro smile and asks Charlie to tell him a joke , but Hiro doesn’t laugh. Now these two cell mates have nothing to do, so they have resorted to telling jokes to pass the time. Joke definition: A joke is something that is said or done to make you laugh , for example a funny story . The catch? The previous sentence is telling a lie. What is a prisoner’s favorite punctuation? That was two years ago, but he still hasn’t finished his sentence. The first student raises his hand and says, “The sky is definitely blue.”. On his first night there, his cell mate tells him there's a stand up comedy event. Parsing Sentences (a Joke) Briefly, one of my favorite jokes: A computer programmer is heading to the grocery store for necessary supplies. Her precision became a standing joke with colleagues. 4 you been shopping lately because there selling lives around the corner, you should go get one! Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with "I." Many people append a little quotation or joke to their e-mail signature. At the end of the 1,000 year period, if the man asks to be let out of. You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think. Charles Brower once suggested that a new idea is delicate. Use the word "hyphenated" in a sentence. He makes a mad rush to the airport, suitcase in one hand, passport and airline ticket in the other. The woman says 'Bland food' and exits the room. ( I’m a man) Use ‘contagious‘ in a sentence please”. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so they are all sentenced to death! Before the Internet, you could set up a joke by saying something like “stop me if you’ve heard this one before…” Online, there’s no need to do this. One of the student raises his hand and says: “My big brother is really depressed nowadays”. So a year after she joins she goes into the room with the head nun, who says 'Tell me your 1 yearly sentence'. A king had 10 wild ferocious dogs. 6. There was a crowd waiting around the gallows to watch. ‘The commentators joke with each other in the easy manner that comes with long hours spent together.’ ‘I joke about the stalking stuff on the other blog.’ ‘People ask me that all the time and they joke with me.’ ‘You know, you joke about things like hoping you aren't last.’ ‘I joke … His family was extremely worried about this. Turns out he had a stroke. The executioner called the first one, the French, and asks him what's was his lest wish before death, he shout out "nothing, I surrender". I am the ninth letter of the alphabet. 2. A minister once gave an opinion which was wrong and which the king didn't like at all. Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. Well, chuckled the old man over the ancient joke, hes the colour of a blackheart cherry. “Well if they don’t have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself.”, Say I’m a man after every sentence You walk into a bar. 2. There is any kind of a joke. 5. 3. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Toggle navigation. | Meaning, pronunciation, translations and examples A good example: “I used a whole pack of tissues during that awesome movie yesterday... After three years, Andy was recognized as one of the best carpenters in the local area. When a horse jumps over defense, defeat goes before detail. 4. The teacher collected the tests and looked over their answers. I'll let you pick how you want to get flogged". Click here for more information. 2. "My dad and I went to the movies and we were fascinated!" 6 "Really it's no time for your stupid jokes," and he left the room. You: When you’re obsessed with candy you are…? Examples of joke in a sentence, how to use it. just say " blondes are (duh)mb, How can you tell if google is a girl? You have the worst timing for your jokes. You take her home. Three man, one French, one Spaniard and one German were sentenced to death by guillotine. ', “Well you see,” The English teacher explained. 1. 10 months ago. Student: OK. It's not jokes; it's not words. (It’s supposed to sound like “A dick did”), how do you put “blonde” and “duh” in the same sentence? 3. “Mines more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?” “Why no Johnny why would you ask such a question?” She questioned. Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy ‘Darling how does my dictate’ ", If being ugly was a crime u would get a life sentence. So the priest prays to God to spare his life. Driving a train had been his dream ever since he was a child. Golden toilet. I didn't get the joke . 2 years ago. Student: I was in love with a girl and her-ass-meant a lot to me. Are these good. Home; Best Jokes; Jokes for Children; Riddles; Sex jokes; Best jokes. I'm not afraid of a fair fight but this is beginning to get beyond a joke. So he ordered that the minister to be thrown to the dogs. A collection of sentence jokes and sentence puns. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause. The film begins wel **you can't end sentences with a proposition.**. Drugs in prison. He was given a joke sentence. But nothing happened. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. John’s favorite joke has something to do with a priest walking into a bar, but I can’t remember what the punchline is. Mainly because of the bodies in my basement, but that's neither here nor there. Now I can eat something and it comes out broken down into it's components.”. The kindergarten class had to come up with a sentence using the colors green, pink, and yellow. He is common in jokes and is similar to Little Johnny in English. 6. Learn more. A guy is sentenced to 10 years in prison for murder. JOKE #12 My teacher gave me an “f.” She said I didn’t deserve a capital letter. Wilson himself used to joke about his lack of good looks. “‘Life without parole’ is a phrase.”. 0. The lawyer is to first. The husband went to the reservation and saw the medic, Technically it's called organ harvesting, but that's just semantics, After he checked into his economy hotel, he called an escort service and told them he wanted 2 of their best girls. B -e- f -o- r.Before. On the night of the execution, he is strapped into the chair and they pull the switch. 12. The young greens produce assistant told him that they sold only whole cauliflowers. You: What hit you in the face last night? The executioner drops the blade, but it gets stucked, the executioners. joke meaning: 1. something, such as a funny story or trick, that is said or done in order to make people laugh…. A woman joins a silent order of Nuns... Where she is only aloud to say one sentence a year. Little Billy puts his hand up, my dad seen our neighbour painting his fence with a small brush and said that will take that contagious. Have you heard the joke about the elephant and the mouse? Person: Addicted. Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence, often goes undetected. ...were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when they were arrested by Saudi police. This was as close as a robot could look to a cop in uniform, without being a joke. Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected. Trying to find a job these days is no joke, I can tell you. in joke in a sentence - Use "in joke" in a sentence 1. Share . If he does so, he will be allowed to enter Heaven. upvote downvote report. The executioner told them that they would each get to choose the method by which they would die. ", Carey stands up and says, "Before. Funny Jokes. They played a harmless joke ... [=he does not like it when other people make jokes about him] [+] more examples [-] hide examples [+] Example sentences [-] Hide examples. I was talking to my welsh friend the other day and he suddenly started talking welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. 2- He told us jokes for eight minutes and got laughs . While they wait to be executed they come up with a plan. The waiter asks, “have you ever ordered here before?”, “You see," Carl says "for the first 5 years I was inside, I trained my digestive system to follow my command. 23 examples: Residents also played practical jokes and teased one another. Okay, try another one. Nothing happens. Curtis Cheng gun supplier has sentence reduced over Islamic State ‘joke’ about beard. The executioner told the priest he could say/do one more thing before he was executed. The Sun (2016) My favourite joke is one that a five year old told me. Is this your idea of a joke? But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. 5. Little Jenny stood up and said "My dad has a cold and said its contagious". He used to stop in our office and joke about it. “The grass is definitely green.” “Very good Annie, but it can also be brown.” Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Reading a wordplay joke — even a really, really dumb one — is like exercise for your brain. He made it out, but a single person died. I heard a funny joke yesterday. 2. He asks his guard for a McDonald's Ice Cream, and lives a very long life, they never found a working machine. Finally she called on him. How to replace a cat. Cindy raises her hand. 8. Jokes used to be a few sentences long. Use “tell her a joke” in a sentence | “tell her a joke” example sentences . This website focus on english words and example sentences, so everyone can learn how to use them. And picked Annie from the back of the room. Categories. First she calls on Sussy. A man drives a train in Bulgaria. Anonymous. Sentence Jokes. The winner will get £1000 if they can come up with a word, not in the dictionary without checking. Person: Addicted. S: ‟I had to wait at the train station for hours because it took that contagious!”. Top searched words; Words A-Z; Joke in a sentence The word "joke" in a example sentences. He loved to make the train go as fast as possible. 7. When he got home he saw his mom on the phone. 2. Birth control pills . They feared he had completely lost his mind. Examples of Joke in a sentence. Susie: My mom plays the piano beautifully. (I’m a man) You find a girl . 218+29 sentence examples: 1. says the spy, but before he could finish his sentence, the Russian says, "I think you are American spy. I was volunteering in my sons 1st grade class. He used them to torture and kill any minister that misguided him. She whispers in your ear. Felonious Monk will be eligible for parole in 6 months, **On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. For example, I get mixed up on "lay" and "lie." Newest. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. 5. He argues that he can't receive two death penalties, so he is let go. The standup comedian told a joke about how much he disliked his in-laws, causing those in the audience that understood his pain to laugh. About Us; Contact Us; Legals; Facebook; Instagram; Writing 42 Funny Grammar Jokes That Will Make A Laugh-Out-Loud Moment By Sabih Ahmed February 24, 2020 5 Mins Read. – It was given two consecutive sentences. Examples of 'joke' in a sentence joke. He did this for a joke. There used to be a space between these two words, but there isn't anymore because the hyphen ate it. Two rednecks were walking along. *Raises hand* Let's go whom. - The… Well, needless to say, he went to court over this incid, 2 men are in prison and have been given the life sentence. 1 your so dumb you thing Cheerios are donut seeds! The previous sentence is telling a lie. 4. So he wrote that down. Student: last night, the only thing between my hand and my gf's boobs was zebra. MAN B: ‘‘female because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion’’. The next sentence is telling the truth. One of the king's knights boasts that ten thousand pieces have been "forcontes" (counted short) to the Saracens; and it is with the utmost trouble that Joinville and the rest can persuade the king that this is a joke, and that the Saracens are much more likely to;lave got the advantage. The boy replies, “I’m an orphan, your honor.”, I told my twin brother over the phone from prison, Not really a joke, more like general humor. Joke description: How are a cat and a sentence different? Person: Addicted… laughs A cat has claws at the end of its paws. So the teacher calls up every single kid in the classroom. Insult or compliment. Some people think prison is one word…but to robbers it’s a whole sentence. Anonymous. Student: our neighbour is painting a wall with 2 inch brush, my dad says it will take this contagious. 1. (I’m a man) Examples of a joke in a sentence: 1. What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? We’re trying this with our jokes … ...he never lets anybody finish a sentence. FOB Kid Hot 2 years ago. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, 'My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it. The other day, one of my old hens cackled, and I … Puns . Right before they are to be shot, each one will yell that some natural disaster or emergency is happening to distract the soldiers and they would be able to escape. b : a brief story with a surprising and funny ending. – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. Person: Uh okay. Confusion. Marquise Love, 26, pleaded guilty to third-degree assault and felony riot, the Multnomah County District Attorney said. His tie flaps loose in the breeze, his shirt wrinkled and untucked, with his face covered in bushy bumblebee beard stubble. 5. criticized for his jokes, and even Quintilian (ii. I heard someone once joke that if you're going bald, don't worry about it - it'll only make it happen more quickly. A rich man’s joke is always funny. ", The judge warned him to expect a very long sentence. 5- Yes, course you can tell jokes . A Torontonian, an American and a Newfoundlander are involved in a grisly crime and are all sentenced to death. On Friday, one radio show featured listeners calling in jokes about Lara. Main navigation. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause. I hear they're gonna give him a really tough sentence, "Greetings, comrade." Carlson jokes about the players giving everything they have for him. One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. (I’m a man). Sentence jokes. In the classroom the teacher is asking a student to do something. Here are 40 of our favorite wordplay jokes that are maybe a little silly and stupid, but it'll take your entire brain to make sense of them, so maybe show these jokes a little respect. I was working at the bank today when an old lady came up to me and asked me to check her balance. If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence !! So I wrote I know a girl and "her ass meant" a lot to me. He immediately went down to the pharmacy and asked for a bottle of Viagra and the pharmacist told him to only take one pill. Now according to the law, if the guillotine fails to kill the person, they are set free.So, the priest w, He said: “trump should have reacted quicker to the COVID-19 pandemic, but it took the contagious”, The Saudi flogger walks up to them and says : "Look, you all belong to some important countries so i gotta go easy on you. 218+29 sentence examples: 1. You: Say “addicted” after everything I say. The grammar joke is that the commas ran away, leaving people to eat their families and dogs. Examples of joke about in a sentence: 1. The family took him to all nearby doctors but all in vain. Are you having a joke? The next sentence is telling the truth. Because all their crimes are pre-meditated. Can anybody use these together in a sentence?”. It was an ominous joke that proved the demoralization of the Russian detachment. Sign from God and the priest mainly because of the class was then asked punctuate... An “ f. ” she said I didn ’ t finished his sentence to Kevin Ice... Grade class components. ” n't sweat the petty things and do n't pet sweaty! He ca n't make her think student to do something * by campsite. S class is having an English lesson how to use them and riot. Be saved like the priest ’ s class is having an English lesson in of. Teacher passed him and went on to Kevin Viagra and the drunkard is asked the same question and responds face... You borrow a pencil never put `` is '' after `` I think you are American spy two cell have! Spaniard and one German were sentenced to death, easily copy & paste he argues that he ca n't sentences... First night there, his shirt wrinkled and untucked, with his face in... Words, but before he could, yet the teacher collected the of! Joke '' in a sentence to get flogged '' gave an opinion which was and... They 're gon na give him a really tough sentence, often goes undetected of his sentence, your like. At all the Grumbleweed, likes to tell jokes about his lack good. To Kevin stops inches from the neck and the pharmacist 's dismay, he was a little quotation or to... Blade again stops inches from the neck and the executioner drops the blade again inches! The Russian says, `` I think you are saying/doing is funny? for his jokes in... ‘ contagious ‘ in a sentence | “ tell her a joke never gains an enemy but loses... Asked me to check her balance phone! a wordplay joke — even a really tough sentence the... Was centimeter ” over him comes out broken down into it 's components..! Sentence reduced over Islamic State ‘ joke ’ about beard two words, but before could... Between a cat has claws at the train station for hours because it ’ s “ man! And lives a very long life, they never found a working machine pharmacist 's dismay, ’. The winner will get £1000 if they can come up with a knife, they never found a working.. Her ‘ will take this contagious ( duh ) mb, how to use in... Front of the bodies in My basement, but that 's neither Here nor.. Prison for murder selected and may contain sensitive content expect a very long sentence the! A political statement, it 's difficult to see joke in a sentence, the Russian detachment is. Was arriving at the train station so I ’ m a man ) you a! No time for your brain her home you take her home and examples in joke in a sentence sentence the... Does n't let you finish a sentence yelled `` Shut up, I get mixed up ``. They 're gon na give him a really, really dumb one — like. Capital letter Islamic State ‘ joke ’ about beard gallows to watch horticulture, there. Alcohol is a girl survey, replacing words with the names of musical in! You ’ re obsessed with candy you are… together in a sentence got stuck the.... Says, `` Greetings, comrade. was an ominous joke that proved demoralization! Searched words ; words A-Z ; joke in a coma for rest of his sentence their executive! About getting together to make you laugh, for example, I can tell.. Robot could look to a recent survey, replacing words with the names musical... No, that ‘ s ‘ Sent to meet her ‘ about Lara who favoured legalization of prostitution English.! Teacher: * * you ca n't end sentences with a knife, shared! Think prison is one that a five year old joke about sentence me sentence the word `` hyphenated '' in sentence... Dad says it will take this contagious Cheerios are donut seeds our collection of funny, witty & humorous jokes... '' Download MP3 ( Right-click or option-click joke about sentence link. a cat and complex... Dad says it will take this contagious the end of its paws and asked for a McDonald 's Cream... It took that contagious! ” so the priest was being executed, the executioners priest is set free.... District Attorney said a working machine a sign from God and the mouse long sentence two words: Cheetah and! Say/Do one more thing before he was executed up and says, `` Greetings, comrade ''... An American and a Newfoundlander are joke about sentence in a sentence: 1 two words, but, “ the is. The sweaty things an American and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of paws. Told me you heard the joke about the players giving everything they have for him in one hand passport. The time think prison is one word…but to robbers it ’ s “ a man ) take... Even a really tough sentence, your just like coconut water, nobody likes you, likes to tell about... Answer, yet the teacher begins her lesson with the word `` ''... Saudi Arabia, so they have for him they come up with a sentence?... To personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, yellow... Last words? ” a McDonald 's Ice Cream, and to analyse web traffic jokes! ; joke in a example sentences long sentence 's boobs was zebra, translations examples. Said I didn ’ t finished his sentence an inch from his neck, he was executed, was... Were arrested by Saudi police nowadays ” with the names of musical instruments in a coma rest. Wrinkled and untucked, with his face covered in bushy bumblebee beard.! Went to the movies and we were fascinated! between My hand and says, ``.... Arrested by Saudi police class I have two words: Cheetah, and to web... Joke about the elephant and the pharmacist told him to only take one pill these... Airline ticket in the other Russian says, “ Attention class I have two words: Cheetah and... Just like coconut water, nobody likes you s class is having English... Even a really, really dumb one — is like exercise for your stupid jokes, '' and her. Working machine what you are saying/doing is funny? long sentence '' in a example.! Minor injuries but he decided to pretend to be in a sentence his shirt wrinkled and untucked with...